


DISAPPEAR (REMEMBER WHEN)

by TopherIsATribble



Category: Three Days Grace (Band)
Genre: Angst, Death, Denial, Depression, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Multi, Suicidal Thoughts, fistfighting
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-16
Updated: 2015-07-16
Packaged: 2018-04-09 14:56:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,842
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4353257
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TopherIsATribble/pseuds/TopherIsATribble
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A huge loss shakes the members (past and present) of Three Days Grace.</p>
            </blockquote>





	DISAPPEAR (REMEMBER WHEN)

Matt was hanging out with Brad for the day.

It was nice, really, the two of them spending time as brothers on a break from touring. It was only a five day break, but it was a break nonetheless. Usually they were busy doing one thing or another on tour and didn't get to spend much time to the two of them. They had gone for ice cream, and then to the movies. Now they were at Brad's place and playing Guitar Hero. Matt was beating Brad every turn, which was weird, because usually Brad was a fair fight, but today it was like he was barely playing. Matt frowned as he beat Brad for the tenth time and set the toy guitar aside, pulling the other out of Brad's hands and setting it aside too.

"Brad, man, are you okay?" He asked, concerned for his brother. As Matt gave Brad a once-over, he realized his brother looked far more pale and distracted than he usually ever was. "Brad, come on, man, what's wrong?" He pulled his brother to sit down on the couch.

"Nothing, man, I'm fine. Just tired. Barry was snoring all night and I couldn't sleep, that's all." Brad brushed his brother's concern off. He didn’t like his brother worrying about him. His brother was younger, he was the one who was supposed to worry.

“Are you sure, Brad? I mean, I can take you to the hospital if you’re feeling sick... Maybe it’s food poisoning. I knew that ice cream place was shady...” Matt moved his hand to his brother’s forehead to check for a fever, still concerned, reeling back as his hand was slapped away.

“I told you, Matt, I’m fine. I’m just tired.” His voice was almost normal for that, but Matt could hear a little whine, asking him to leave it alone. Matt frowned, swallowing, but left it be. “You wanna put in a movie?” Brad asked, trying to deflect.

“Yeah, sure, Brad,” Matt murmured, still concerned, on edge. “Put on what you want... It’s starting to get late. We can watch it and then I’ll go home for the night and let you rest.” He swallowed, watching as Brad put on a random movie, the longest one he found on at the moment. He pulled Matt into his arms and Matt cuddled close to his older brother. Matt heard his older brother whisper that he loved him and smiled, murmuring back an "I love you" of his own.

It was things like these that Matt took for granted; time with his brother was something he had known and loved literally the entirety of his life. They had had their sibling squabbles, sure, but whenever he had needed someone, Matt had come crawling to Brad, whether he needed a shoulder to cry on or someone to help plot revenge against that asshole who had been picking on him.

Despite his worries about his brother, Matt found himself curling close and really getting into the movie. It was about an hour in that he realized Brad had gone slack and that the arms around him had gone limp.

Matt began to panic, making first a call to Neil. "Get your ass over here, I'm at Brad's, I fucking need you." It was all Matt said after Neil had picked up, his voice urgent, hanging up on the man and ignoring Neil's confused call so he could call an ambulance.

"I.. My brother isn't breathing, he's gone slack... Please help me." They were his first words and soon he was being askedto provide the address, which he did, and then to start CPR until someone arrived. Matt nodded, leaving the line on, as he started to try to revive his older brother. He was only 38. This couldn't be happening. He couldn't lose Brad.

Soon enough the ambulance arrived, and after a quick attempt by the paramedics to revive him there, they looked at each other, then Matt, brinking in a stretcher so they cold get Brad to the ambulance. Just as Matt was getting ready to leave, Neil drove up, and Matt called out at him. "Follow! Call Barry!" He swallowed, looking at the man he had always loved, terrified, before loading up and the ambulance was off.

He held Brad's hand the entire way, so much colder than he was used to even with his brother's normally cool touch. "Come on, Brad... I need you... Please... You're going to be okay... I love you." He swallowed hard as they pulled into the hospital and Brad was taken to the ER and Matt was told he would have to wait for them, that they would lead him to a room to wait in.

Matt turned around to see Neil behind him, and he quickly grasped Neil's hand, making sure they wouldn't be separated as they were led to that room off to the side. Soon the door was closed and Matt was pulling Neil into a needy hug. Neil's own arms wrapped strongly around him, understanding that Matt needed that kind of strength right now.

"Matt, man, what's happening? I called Barry, he's on his way. You didn't tell me anything and then I see this and just... What the fuck is even going on?" He held tight to Matt, letting the younger man decide to let go.

"I... He and I were hanging out all day and we went for ice cream and then came back and played Guitar Hero a while and we quit because he wasn't playing like normal and he said he was just tired because Barry snored so fucking much last night and he couldn't sleep so we put on a movie and I was gonna go home after that so he could rest because I thought he was just feeling under the weather and then I noticed he had just gone slack and wasn't moving or breathing and was colder than usual about an hour into the movie and then I called you and then I called the ambulance. Fuck, Neil. He has to be okay, he has to." Matt's words were rapid fire, no break for air in the middle in his fear that his last words might not be true.

Neil swallowed, continuing to hug Matt tight as Barry walked in, unsure of what to say. He held tight until Matt let go, eyes red with tears, Neil fighting tears if his own. Barry watched, obviously confused, until Matt gave him a nearly identical rapid fire speech. 

Soon more calls were made and Dani and Shawn were joining them for their vigil. The room was small and almost claustrophobic, no one knowing what to say in reply to Matt's rambling speech about the situation. Dani and Shawn sat in chairs, Barry stood against the wall, texting, and Neil was watching Matt pace around as he stood against the countertop in the room, shielding Matt from the pamphlets on depression and loss.

Neil heard his phone buzz with a message from Barry. He pulled it up, his screen showing words no one dared to say aloud around Matt. 

\---------------

BARRY: This isn't good, man. I think we should tell him. It's been over an hour and a half.

\---------------

Neil frowned at the message, glad Matt wasn't paying attention to anything but the floor.

\---------------

NEIL: We can't. He's barely holding on right now and they're going to have to tell him. If they can't do anything, they'll be in here soon. But Brad, fuck... Brad was like the healthiest one of all of us. I just can't fucking believe it... He's my oldest friend but I have to be here for Matt. I can't fall apart. I can't. 

\---------------

As soon as Neil sent the text off, he heard foosteps. There was just enough time for Barry to read it as the door was opened. A doctor and a nurse stood there, expressions somber. Matt stopped his pacing and looked up almost hopefully. "Well?" He asked, eyes searching out the doctor's own.

"I'm sorry, Matthew," the doctor said, the name that Matt always used on official papers. "Your brother Bradley didn't make it. He had a stroke, very rare at his age, but to determine the cause there will have to be an autopsy. I can let you gentlemen see him and say your goodbyes. Then he will be transported to the morgue where we will perform an autopsy. I suggest you get in touch with the funeral home of your choice in the next few hours. I am very sorry to have to bring you this news."

"No. No." Matt swallowed. "He's alive. He's asleep. He's just tired. He's going to be okay."

The doctor watched the young man. He opened his mouth to speak but Neil cut him off. "Why don't you show us where he is?" He reached to grasp Matt's hand and the doctor nodded somberly.

"Right this way." Neil sighed, fighting tears as he watched angry, defiant ones stream down Matt's cheeks.

"Why?" Barry whispered in Neil's ear as they walked and Neil just shook his head. 

"We'll deal with it in a few." That was all he said as they were brought to see Brad's body, covered save for his face.

Matt swallowed. "Brad... Please... I... When you wake up... Call me." He swallowed and moved to kiss his brother's forehead, hugging him close. An orderly with everything Brad had been wearing approached to hand the bag to Matt but Neil intercepted it, tossing the bag quietly to Shawn.

Soon enough, Matt stepped back, and Barry, Shawn, and Dani stepped forward to say their goodbyes to their friend, returning to that room. Neil held Matt close.

"Matt... Matt, man... I know it's hard to believe but he's gone. I'm so sorry..." Neil held him close, kissing the top of his head.

"But he CAN'T be," Matt whined, more tears falling and tears of Neil's own started to fall. "I need him..." 

"I know, Matt... I know. But right now we need to say goodbye for a few days... Cmon." He walked Matt back towards the shell that had used to be Brad, swallowing and hugging Brad a moment before letting Matt hug him once more, watching the younger man kiss his brother's forehead once more.

They headed back to the room, where Shawn handed Matt the bag. "These, uh, these were his, Matt... They rightfully belong to you." Even the normally confident Hammer wasn't so confident anymore. Each of the guys hugged Matt in turn before Neil's arms were wrapping back around him.

"Come on, guys... Let's go to the diner for some breakfast. It's right around opening time... Then Matt and I can take care of arrangements." All the guys agreed and Neil was soon leading Matt out to his car.

"It's going to be okay, Matt," Neil murmured. He made sure Matt was buckled in correctly before pulling out of the hospital parking lot and making his way towards the diner they all enjoyed.


End file.
